Sunday, November 14, 2010

Kill them with humor

Stephan Kinsella and Mike Rozeff urge the use of humor in battling the TSA. Here's a great example: a traveler who was fed up with emptying his pockets now just takes off his pants and puts them through the scanner. Underneath, he's got underwear with a sarcastic message ("I <heart> TSA").

For those of you who plan to opt-out next time, here's my twist on it. When the TSO starts the "We've got an opt-out" echo, start stripping. You can have a bathing suit on so that there's no way you'll get an indecency citation. Or maybe get a message printed on your undies. The "I <heart> TSA" is great because it can't possibly be construed as offensive. Other possibilities are "Frisk me for freedom" or "I love a good pat-down." Please share your ideas in the comments.

4 comments:

  1. I love the idea!! But I have an even better one!

    You know those guards with the silly hats that patrol around Buckingham Palace, etc? How tourists always pose for pictures with them and try to annoy them in every way possible, even though they must remain stoic at all times?

    Well... how about having people wear "I heart TSA" shirts and the like... and have them clamor to pose with TSA workers as if they were celebrities. That should annoy them quite a bit, if they can manage to stay out of the way enough that they wouldn't be arrested for interfering with security operations (unless there are some souls brave enough to do that).

    There could be shirts like:

    "I'm with this (TSA) pedophile! (arrow pointing left)"
    "Strip if you love the TSA!"
    "Erotic frisking... $50... anal fisting.. $200... TSA Strip Search... just the price of your freedom!"

    Or even undergarments that say stuff like:

    "Labias of Mass Destruction"
    "Ate a burrito last night, today's special is weaponized farts."
    "Biohazard zone: TSA agent please insert probe here."

    People could strip completely nude in line, except for cleverly placed underwear and body paint that spells out a message and covers their butts on indecency laws.

    Some ideas are outlandish... some messages are a bit dirty... but like Lew said, if we want to discredit the TSA, we have to reduce them to such a point where nobody takes them seriously anymore. An excellent way to do that would be this.

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  2. @Ryan - I also came across this shirt this weekend:
    http://www.stopgropingme.com/site

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  3. If it were me (I won't fly, but let's say...) I would opt for the grope. I would ask that it be performed in a public location. I would ask that it be performed by a member of the opposite sex. I would then make extremely loud, extremely sexual noises as they touched me. I would ask, in a heavily pornographic voice, for them to touch me everywhere they are touching me. I would act, for all intents and purposes, like I was really really enjoying myself.

    If everyone did this, public opinion would change. Quickly.

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  4. What exactly would you people like to have? Do you want to have complete freedom to get on and airplane and off an airplane with nothing to stop you? Do you want to be able to carry on every conceivable thing you own such as guns, knives pepper spray etc because by GOD you are Americans and can do what you want? The airlines own millions of dollars of equipment and are responsible for the safety of thousands of people every day. Israeli security doesn't need all of that stuff because they have armed guards at their airports and they don't fly the millions of people of all differenty ethnic groups around the country so they can afford not to. I hear a lot of bitching and complaining but not a lot of constructive ideas. So genious's just how do you keep the skys safe?

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